From The Onion (this one's for you J5)

The Onion | America's Finest News Source™: "Report: U.S. Leads World In Lost Sunglasses
WASHINGTON, DC—According to a report by the Bureau of Accessory Statistics, each year the U.S. loses more pairs of sunglasses per person than any other nation. 'Over 1.6 billion pairs of sunglasses are lost by Americans concerned with shielding their eyes from excess light and harmful UVA radiation,' the report read. 'This works out to six pairs of sunglasses per American per year, or 50 pairs of sunglasses lost every second.' In second place, Italy has a lost-sunglasses rate of one pair per citizen per year, followed by Japan, Iceland, and Portugal with loss rates of .23, .19, and .16 respectively"